Claygate
Sunday August 11 in Claygate Strollers won by 88 runs Strollers 243-5 (40 overs; Pittams 98no, Oliver 81, Travis 16, Mangham 13, Love 12, Rogers 12) Claygate 155 (33.2 overs; Macaulay 3-47, Mangham 2-0, Richie Stubbs 2-14, Rogers 2-25, Broster-Turley 1-5) It was mid-August, the height of summer, and there was
tremendous excitement for this week’s fixture. A scheduled 2pm late start would
allow plenty of time for the bucket list worthy golf & cricket
double-header (aka “the longest day in sport”) to be summarily struck off said
list having been concocted as a very achievable (and worthy) feat just two
weeks prior in the fading sunlight at Chenies and Latimer over more than one
thirst quenching post-match lager.
A “transparency update” posted very early in this week’s
match WhatsApp chat announced that an expeditious (and hyperactive) threesome
of Michael Pittams, Freddie Broster-Turley, and George Love had secured a
8.32am tee slot for a “swift and no doubt erratic 18 holes” at Pine Ridge Golf
Club; a well struck 9-iron away from Valley End CC at Lightwater, Surrey.
Steve Rogers quickly accepted the spot on offer for the
final ball in the foursome and hastily set about procuring some golf clubs (“I
shall consult old FB marketplace and try not to get scammed” quickly changed to
“seems like a good excuse to buy some new clubs”).
More on the golf later.
As it transpired, Valley End could not raise a side so an
alternative fixture was found against Claygate CC in Surrey. Indeed, match
fixture secretary Simon Brodbeck had played a blinder, doing an exceptional job
finding an alternative fixture within a cooee of Pine Ridge’s locality and
negotiated a 1.30pm start to enable the golfing quartet to get to the match on
time. And tea would be provided!
When Sunday came, it really was a scorcher (28C high). The
pre-match WhatsApp chat was filled with glorious video footage from Pine Ridge,
with swing analysis welcomed. The all-Kiwi quartet completed their round by
12.15pm, leaving time to “quickly rehydrate” on the 19th hole whilst watching
Ellesse Andrews win New Zealand’s 10th and final gold medal of the 2024 Paris
Olympics in Women’s Sprint Cycling. [For the record, Pittams shot the
lowest score (low 80s), followed by Broster-Turley, then Rogers and Jorgito
Love losing count somewhere during the round].
Now to the cricket. What greeted the Strollers at Claygate was a glorious
setting: a proper club based in the village recreation ground with excellent
facilities. The pavilion was recently rebuilt and included a lovely modern cafe
selling the usual cafe food but also lattes, ice cream and draught beers. The
cricket field contained two mature trees: one at fine leg and one at wide
long-on for a right-hander batting at the pavilion end.
More on the trees later.
There really was some pressure on James Dela Rue, today’s
skipper, to win the toss and bat first to give the golfers time to recover.
Rogers proposed a novel strategy for Dela Rue - take Glen Oliver out to the
middle with him and inform the opposition skipper that whatever Oliver called,
Dela Rue was calling the opposite. However, the skipper had a more cunning plan
and negotiated the toss with FSSCC to bat first.
Blair Travis and Love were selected to open, whilst No 3
bat Ben Mangham was the first to succumb to the temptations of the cafe, seen
devouring two scoops of ice cream fully kitted in batting pads as the openers
strode out.
Claygate opted for slow bowling from the outset,
well-suited to the dry and dusty pitch. It was immediately evident the
opposition were a good fielding side, stopping many firmly struck shots in the
early overs. As James Stubbs would later compliment, Claygate was stacked with
“high functioning ex-grade cricketers, strong in their youth”.
The off-spinning Umar Nasir proved a particular thorn in
Travis and Love’s side with neither overly keen to face a bowler turning the
ball voraciously. Love, aiming to make Strollers history by becoming the first
player to score 150 twice in the same day, was the first to be dismissed,
bowled for 12 in the sixth over. Travis departed two overs later for 16,
dismissed in a similar mode to a violently turning Nasir off-spin delivery.
Thus, Nasir was relieved from bowling with 2-12 from four overs, but came back
later for a second wicketless spell. Mangham’s stint at the crease went similar
to Travis and Love’s: bowled for 13.
Progress was slow in the first 20 overs with a score of 93
and only six boundaries struck. Fortunately, Oliver and Pittams had brought
their A-game to spare the blushes of the top three bats and were able to dominate
in the final 20 overs. The pair put on 139 runs for the fourth wicket as the
sun shone and the onlooking Strollers made full use of the cafe’s refreshments.
Single runs dominated the scorebook as the temperature soared and Oliver’s
enthusiasm for running wilted to an all-time low. [Noteworthy fact:
Oliver had eight twos; Pittams had zero twos #statchat (@mpittams
jeez, can’t you hit the gaps!)].
More on Oliver’s running later. Now back to the trees.
Pittams, looking resplendent in his 80s open neck polo,
sweat on the brow, chest hair flowing, thick moustache with greying hairline,
and very much cut from the same ilk as famous Australian cricketers like Dennis
Lillee and Rod Marsh, really does like to give the cricket ball a good wallop.
Whilst the scorebook would correctly reflect four sixes in
his innings, Pittams’ first walloping of the cricket ball was mis-directed, and
thus brought into play the local rule whereby any contact on the full with a
tree situated in the field of play would be recorded as four runs, regardless
of the likely outcome, which in this instance was never in doubt as the ball
sailed out of the recreation ground flicking a twig on its way. Nonchalantly,
Pittams shrugged off the result. Two runs lost, surely inconsequential.
Now back to Oliver’s running.
Into the 37th over, the epic partnership was headed towards
its finale. Both Oliver and Pittams, very much aware thanks to the electronic
scoreboard, were faced with a dash to their hundred milestones with remaining
deliveries quickly diminishing. Oliver attempted to steal a bye off a fumble by
the wicketkeeper, but a quick recovery and direct hit brought to an end his
valiant innings of 81.
Fast forward to the 40th over.
The innings ended in curious fashion when Pittams declined
an easy second run, ran out the luckless Steve Rogers (“sold him up the river”)
and ended up stranded at the non-striker’s with one ball remaining, thus ending
just short of what would have been a glorious century. [It really is
difficult to do justice to this acrimonious act of jug avoidance, so I shall
repeat what happened].
Rogers on strike. Pittams on 97 not out.
Ball 1: dot - quite wide, actually very, but we like to be
lenient with our application of the wide law, especially on searing hot days.
Ball 2: dot - swing and a miss!
Ball 3: four runs - clipped cleanly off the hips to fine
leg, possibly the first Strollers leg glance of the season!
Ball 4: one run - bat on ball, does the job!
Pittams on strike:
Ball 5: one run - walloped to deep mid-wicket, loud call of
“two” from Pittams. Rogers tears off for the first, turns for the second and
pumps his legs with urgency knowing full-well Pittams will DEFINITELY be
haring back for the second (bet your house on it). Rogers, now halfway down.
An acrimonious shout of “NO!!” from Pittams. Rogers departs… [Ed: the
remainder of this sentence has been screened for inappropriate use of foul
language in a match report, however, the scribe wished to note Rogers was
unimpressed].
Broster-Turley on strike:
Ball 6: dot - rather forgettable!
The Strollers innings ended on 243-5. Pittams ended on a
magnificent 98 not out. “I am not a man who looks for personal glory,” said our
bashful hero.
To tea.
Pizza, sandwiches, cake. Fantastic! All put on by the cafe.
Cunningly, each team were allocated a separate table. Word had gotten out
on the Strollers reputation for being prodigious tea
connoisseurs.
Claygate made a valiant effort in pursuit of a daunting 244
for victory but fell short by 88 runs. Broster-Turley produced his usual
impressive opening burst (5-1-5-1) before Alastair Macaulay (8-0-47-3) wove his
mid-innings web. Richie Stubbs (2-14) and Mangham (2-0) also picked up wickets,
whilst Rogers toiled away lucklessly with some off-spinners only to cop a nasty
bruise from a tracer bullet smacked back at him.
Pittams, satisfied from having scored more runs playing
cricket than strokes hit playing golf, treated himself to an ice-cream cone at
the drinks break, later finished off whilst fielding on the midwicket boundary.
The post-match inquest into the day’s matters went on deep
into the evening as the late summer sun set slowly in the west. The hospitality
was much appreciated and the day was declared a resounding success. We
hope to see Claygate on next season’s fixture list.
Capt: James Dela Rue. Wkt: George Love. Match fees: Alastair Macaulay. Match report: Blair Travis..
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